I must not tell you what you want to hear – Mountain Lesson No. 36
I must not tell you what you want to hear.
I recently started reading The Millionaire Fastlane, by MJ DeMarco. Some readers may think it's quite arrogant in how it starts off, but to be honest I think that's what most of us need–and when I say ‘us’ you know I mean ‘I’.
The author talks about how if you're not getting the results that you want then you need to stop doing what you’ve been doing and make a change—or several. I know! I know! We've heard all that before. If you do what you've always done, you will get what you've always got!
We’ve heard the definition of insanity and all those kinds of things, but they're a little bit like the quotes that everyone pedals on social media—and yep! I pedal them, too. We see them and we think “oh yeah!” and our creative mind throw up a glimmer of hope, then we don't actually do anything about it. This happens also with seminars and books, where we hear and read these things and we think “Yeah! alright! high five! let's make a change!” and then we walk out and go back to our normal job and lose that temporary momentum. We see it happen around us, I've done it before, and I almost guarantee that you've done it before, too.
My challenge for you for today is this: what change are you actually going to make to move closer to what you want?
Recently I had to give a client of mine a pep talk–with a big dash of tough love. He wasn't getting the change that he wanted and he'd been doing the same thing for over a year now. I said to him “Okay dude, what's it worth to you to actually get this? What's the outcome that you want? Why is it so important? and are you actually prepared to do what it takes or not?!%$*&!”
After shrinking in his chair and getting smaller and smaller because he could see that I was fed up with having this same conversation, he pondered the reasons why he wanted change, and decided to commit. What I had him agree to do before the following week’s session was to create a simple strategy—in fact it was really just an ordered list—however a list still requires thinking and doing. This list was essentially a plan of all the things he was going to do in the following 7 days, and my gosh I was going to hold him accountable to get it done.
I could have been the ‘nice’ coach and told him what he wanted to hear. “Good job, keep trying, keep doing what you are doing, be patient, things will work out, the Universe will bring the result to you bla bla bla…” But who does this ‘nice’ coaching really serve? Part of a coach’s responsibility is to hold the mirror up and show our clients that the results they are getting are because of their actions and decisions—and to even go so far as to remind them that a decision to not take action is still a decision and therefore an action. Ouch!
Now it’s your turn!
What’s that thing that popped into your head when I started talking about change? In my experience you most likely you know what it is, and perhaps you’re avoiding acknowledging it. Write it down on a piece of paper. Then, take four minutes to write down a bunch of things you can do to get that change started.
For example, in the case of my client, he was looking for a new job to supplement his side gig income. His process so far was to do what over 95% of job searchers do–search for jobs online then send a resume, lobbing it over the proverbial fence and hoping to hear back with good news. This is not a very successful strategy for securing a great job because it’s also the least confrontational, requiring the least effort and keeps applicants in their comfort zone and hence it’s the most popular method. Applications are scanned by software to find keywords and build profiles of the applicant–good luck, human!
Think for a second, what are a few other ways that he could find a great job?
Networking
Join associations
Build a list of ideal places to work
Target those ideal companies and the decision makers
Volunteer
Talk to his existing clients
So, now back to you, dear human! Start. Your. List. Get. It. Done!
Cheers,
Dan
Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash